Monday, May 5, 2014

the mule

guys, my loyal fans, my dedicated followers, my little minions...

i have a serious case of the-mondays-after-a-four-day-weekend-in-saint-tropez. it’s a very specific case of the mondays, a very tryhard case of the mondays because everyone knows that only tryhards go to saint tropez and then write about it on their blog – but today i feel like being a tryhard, so sue me. so given my case of the mondays where my work-to-break ratio has become 20 minutes of work to 1 hour of fun, I figured I would share my latest fashion musings during one of my many 1 hours of fun-time to be taken throughout today (i should probably de-friend all work colleagues before posting...but hey, i'm a rebel who likes to live on the edge...).

i know every fashion publication that pops up on my facebook newsfeed says that THE MULE is THE shoe of the summer, but i am not 100% convinced for two main reasons, which i will breakdown in the following lines of wisdom if you just bear with me. 

firstly, the mule is just too casual a shoe. sure, i’ll wear it to the park. sure, i’ll wear it while i shop. sure, i’ll wear it to the grocery store. sure, i’ll even wear it to brunch. but will I ever wear it to work? probably not. backless shoes are just too damn unprofessional. now if i were one of those blessed beauties who got live off mah man and chill during the day or had my own company so i didn’t ever have to go to the office – brunchin, munchin, yoga-in (though i don’t think i would ever be into yoga, but i feel like it’s part of the dream – i like to claim that i’d have a super hot bod if i didn’t have a full-time job, but i am about 100.5% sure that would not be the case – i would actually be just as lazy as i am currently, and i would actually probably eat even more baked goods because i would be so damned happy to not be working in an office (in my little life to-date, i have found the chub to happiness correlation is very high – the happier i am, the chubbier i am – my future husband is VERY excited about the sound of this, men everywhere rejoice!!)

okay so my second reason for not being convinced is actually not really related to the mule, but rather to the birkenstock. I know the very appeal of the birkenstock is the fact that it doesn’t totally go, makes your outfit look more caaj, and just makes it seem like you don’t care…but there are times when i just can’t opt for the birkenstock over a shoe that will actually make my outfit cuter. it’s really hard for me, guys. i’ve tried – God knows i’ve tried. i have almost even made it out the door, but then, in the last second, i always relent and switch to the cuter shoes. i do like the floral ones that i have seen out and about, but i still think i would only wear those to pick up flowers or to pick up my kiddies from school or maybe run to the store to grab some milk (obvi to feed those damn kiddies and to try to counteract the fact that their mom is only five feet three inches tall and their grandma only five feet flat).

anyways, there you have it, folks – my stance on the mule and birkenstock. now that all being said, i will obviously still purchase the alexander wang dina mules as well as the isabel marant Birkenstocks since every fashion publication tells me that it is THE it shoe and I need to obviously partake in the trend or else I wouldn’t be much of a caaj kim, would i, butttttttttttttt at least everyone knows how i really feel (does that make it better or worse when i sell out?)

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