"that's so cute! is it new?"

"is that new?" - the dreaded question that is the bane of every caaj girl's existence. a caaj girl doesn't ever want anyone to know that anything she is wearing is new. only a tryhard is excited to tell the world that she spent money to look cute and coordinated in the outfit or accessory she is wearing. a caaj girl likes every piece that she wears to scream "oh this old thing? yeah, i just had it lying around and threw this outfit together at the last minute." what is even worse than admitting you're wearing something new on a random day is admitting that you're wearing something new specially bought for a particular occasion like a party or an event. a caaj girl NEVER buys a dress for a specific event - she always wears something she claims to have worn before.

if your item looks too new, mess it up, scatch it up, muss it up, do whatever it takes to make it look old and worn. this trick usually works to throw observers off the trail. those psycho closet trackers who notice every slight addition or subtraction to a trendsetta's wardrobe (you know who you are), however, are a whole different story. there is no solution to avoiding the questioning of those folks - instead, just blatantly lie and deny. "no, this isn't new. i just haven't worn it. it was at the back of my closet."

the caaj girl also never directly answers the other dreaded question - the follow-up to "is that new?" - the "where did you get it?" question. that's when she goes with either "i don't know, my mom (or dad, depending on how fashion forward he is) got it for me" (but we may be getting too old to use that..) or "a vintage store." whether you  bought the said item at forever21 or bergdorf is irrelevant. the caaj girl likes to pretend that she shops at avante-garde, laid-back retail channels, not mass-marketed, mass-produced chain retail.

hope this helps fellow caaj girls (or fellas) avoid any potential tryhard snafus. while it may seem like caajKim is encouraging blog followers to break one of the ten commadments (not of fashion, but of God) - thou shalt not bear false witness - this is for the greater good of the people. trust me. just deny.

sombrero? not for you, señor.

the caaj approach to hats is to always ask the following question: does this hat help me brave the elements - whether that be rain, shine, or snow. if not, chances are that your hat is tryhard. of course vacation timings present a whole different twist to this approach. the caaj rulebook lets most things slide while on vacation - it is the one loop hole where you are allowed to be a tryhard without remorse. the other loophole is obvi if you are a celebrity - everyone knows that celebrities have to wear hats to be incognito to avoid the papparazzi, duh!

now the rest of us regular caaj people, we do not need a hat. while yes, some of them are certainly cute and you may think that throwing on a fedora with a white tshirt, jeans and raybans on a regular old day is caaj-cute, the proximity to the tryhard line is just too close for comfort. if you are so bold and okay taking this risk, by all means, wear that fedora. if kim kardashian is your idea of caaj-cool, wear that fedora. if you want to be borderline tryhard, wear that fedora. all the rest of us will AVOID.

however, beanies on a chilly winter day are a whole different story. beanies are functional and necessary in the winter and can be worn without the slightest bit of tryhard guilt. throwing a beanie on also messes up your hair to caaj perfection when removed (caaj bonus points!). i particularly like slouchy beanies a la alba and bilson below.

uh uh.

alexander wang - the caaj master. while he definitely puts out designs season after season that embody the caaj aesthetic to the fullest, this particular look from his pre-fall 2011 collection is just a little off the mark, in my humble opinion. there is a fine line between caaj/not tryhard and just plain ugly. stealing my little brother's jeans and my dad's pullover seems a little too caaj-ugly for me. i mean this model is probs 5'10 at least and the way the jeans cut into her proportions makes her look like she's 5'5. this look would make a petite 5'4 princess like me look like a little midget! i would trade out the little brother's shapeless jeans for a better fitted boyfriend jean and fold the bottom. i think that would bring this look back into the realm of caaj-flattering-cool, instead of caaj-what-the-hell-is-that?

combat boots.

combat boots - or "lesbian combat boots" as i lovingly like to call them - are another caaj staple. they can either complete an already caaj, grungy look or you can throw them on with a look that's a little too pretty, a little too perfect and you've immediately found the caaj version of your tryhard outfit. think jessica alba as of late -- she has seemingly mastered this juxtaposition of the too pretty with the grungy boots.

caaj grungy - combat boots accompanied by skinny cargos, leather jacket and loosely tied scarf (rumpled hair optional) a la alessandra ambrosio

caaj pretty - too pretty with a little lesbian combat boot

inspiration of the day.

just love this. the details make the outfit. this outfit would be amazing without the headwrap though (which would obviously make it less of a tryhard get-up). while we all know the turban thing is in (we keep our eye on mary-kate and ash too), it must be worn with caution to avoid looking like a trend-crazed tryhard. the matchy-matchyness of her turban to the heels is just too over the top for my taste. i would wear this particular look (sans headwrap obvi) to a small dinner party or luncheon. this is definitely not a daytime no-event outfit (i.e. i wouldn't wear this to stroll through a park a la the subject of the photo...), but super-cute nonetheless. where you end up wearing this outfit makes all the difference in terms of tryhardness.

all about eyes.

eyewear - the non-tryhard's secret weapon. fake eyeglasses are so tryhard that no one would even suspect that your eyeglasses are fake. it's ingenious! wearing a fancy outfit? throw on eyeglasses (prescription or non-prescription, no one needs to know!) and instantly, not try-hard. full face of makeup? throw on eyeglasses and you instantly blur the perfection of the made-up face. or lastly - wearing a grungy outfit? eyeglasses are the icing on top, completing the grunge, caaj look. while many may think that the big eyeglass trend is slightly passe, i think it's become a staple of sorts that will probably be acceptable to wear for at least another year. so what are the best options?

oliver peoples abrams

rayban caribbean in avana

snowflakes & footsies.

while i have always felt that brisk fall / winter weather allows me to look my fashionable best, it is the snow that brings this argument into question. it is very tough to look fashionable wearing uggs, duck boots, hunters, or any other formulation of the shoe created to keep your footsies warm and dry when the weather is anything but that.

while many will sacrifice their style on the street by donning one of the aforementioned footwear options and changing into the shoes that actually complement slash complete their look once they've arrived at their final destination, this option too is not very appealing. with this option, it is very tough to not feel like a tryhard. it's like "oh this old thing? yeah, i threw it together, but i also happened to bring the shoes that actually complete the look with me in my bag. nbd." - it takes the effortless appeal of the outfit away.

but then what to do? how is this quandary solved?? what shoes should you wear?